How Your Attitude About Race Affects Your Wallet

How Your Attitude About Race Affects Your Wallet

What happens when we fit our own stereotypes

By Stacey Tisdale

I once heard a presentation by Tiffany Taylor Smith, the founder of Culture Learning Partners, a company that helps organizations and individuals navigate cultural differences, discuss ‘inherit bias’ – attitudes we carry about race and culture that we are not aware of. 

I approached her after the program and we discussed how those biases play out in financial behavior. These biases are obvious when we think about the ways in which others treat us.  We’ve all heard or experienced stories of practices like predatory lending, in which equally qualified blacks get higher rates for things like mortgages and cars, from lenders, many of whom are probably not ‘conscious’ about personal prejudices.

The conversation Taylor and I had, however, was more about the ways in which the often-unconscious messages that play in our own heads play out in our experiences with money.

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The Songs We Play In Our Heads

Think about it what comes to mind when you think about your racial, ethnic, even religious orientation, when it comes to money. “People like me always struggle.”  “People like me watch every penny.”  “Our people don’t invest in the markets.”

As Life Planner and founder of Compass Wealth Management, Martin Siesta once told me, “These expectations we put on ourselves and the outside messages we receive have a really strong influence on behavior,” said Siesta. “I would urge people to look at those influences and ethnic messages.  Ask: Is this how the world really is, or is this just how I see it? To create change, you have to be mindful of that, and follow your own common sense…Don’t let stereotypes weigh on your self-esteem,” he adds.

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Solve The Right Problem

Ask yourself the following questions:

1. What do I see people like me doing when it comes to money? What do I see them doing when it comes to saving?  Spending?  Investing? Debt?

2. What do I see people like me not doing when it comes to money? What don’t they do when it comes to saving?  Spending?  Investing?  Debt?

3. How messages am I telling myself about money? “People like me can’t afford to save.”  “People like me always have debt.”  “I can’t even think about retiring.”

4. How would those messages change if I were living my ideal relationship with money…if I were channeling my financial resources towards my goals?

5. How would I act differently and how would my choices change if I operate from my new messages?

Create a support system to snap you out of beliefs that don’t bring you closer to your goals and priorities.  Name them, write them, down, discuss them with friends, and literally rewrite those messages so that they state the highest vision you have for yourself.  

5 Things You Must Consider When Friends and Family Ask for Money

5 Things You Must Consider When Friends and Family Ask for Money

Making Smart Lending Decisions, While Keeping Relationships In Tact

By Stacey Tisdale

A few years ago, I conducted a workshop for a professional sports team about managing money. It was a bittersweet moment for this fan.  I loved this team, yet they were having a horrible season.

The evening before, I invited a friend who was a former pro-athlete, to join me for my presentation. I was hoping he could help me better engage what I feared would be a distracted audience after yet another horrendous loss.

Camaraderie 

Inviting my friend turned out to be a good move.  When I asked him to share what he found to be his biggest financial challenge in his professional career, he said without hesitation, the loans he made to friends and family. That quickly grabbed the team’s attention, with most heads and expressions signaling agreement.The entire energy in the room changed. 

In my work as a financial journalist, and my research in the financial behavior of pro-athletes, I was very familiar with the reality that most run into huge financial challenges - even bankruptcy - soon after their sports careers end.  

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According to Sports Illustrated, within five years of retirement, an estimated 60% of former NBA players are broke.  By the time they have been retired for two years, 78% of former NFL players have gone bankrupt.

Size Doesn’t Matter

The public is quick to blame this on extravagant and irresponsible spending, but in reality, many of them also fall victim to the pressure to lend, as well as support family, friends, and entourages.

Psychologist and psychotherapist, Dr. Jeanette Raymond, says part of it is also chemical. “We’re chemically wired to be drawn to situations where we can rescue someone. It’s very hard to stop”

“When we help someone in need, we get a rush of dopamine that is the same as the release when we feed an addiction,” she adds.

While this dynamic is exacerbated in athletes and celebrities, the pressure to lend comes up at some point for all of us - particularly in groups that experience financial challenges.  A survey by Prudential Financial finds that African-Americans are more likely than other groups to bear financial responsibility for friends and family members, due to factors such as higher incidents of unemployment and barriers to wealth building.

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5 Things To Remember

If a friend or relative asks you for financial support, be sure to consider the following factors:

1) Don’t be an enabler: Does this friend or family member often seem in financial crisis? If so, you could just be enabling bad behavior. If you chose to make a loan, make it with strings, and make them commit to changing their patterns. Make them get show you a financial plan, give you a repayment plan, or seek financial counseling before you hand over any funds.

2) Put your own needs first: If you’re having trouble making ends meet, have significant financial responsibilities on the horizon, or don’t have enough money in emergency savings to cover at least six months of living expenses, you can’t afford to lend money. If your loved one doesn’t understand that, you need to be having a different conversation.

3) Remember the person in the mirror: it’s you who must look in the mirror after you deny a sibling, parent, or best friend a loan. Think about how you will really feel. Be honest with yourself about what you can really live with.

4) Be Realistic: About two thirds of people who lend money never see it again. Don’t count on getting your money back, and talk to your accountant about the IRS codes for gift giving.

5) It’s not just your decision: Do you have financially dependent family members? Remember that it’s not just your financial well-being that’s at stake. You should discuss the impact on your family budget, and find out how everybody feels about making the loan. Make the decision together. You will be glad you are not solely responsible for the outcome.

Love Will Keep Us Together

Financial stress can send our minds and emotions into flight or fright mode, as our brains literally connect money with our ability to survive.  And as we all know, fear can often cloud judgement.

Remind yourself again and again to bring your attention to the connection you have with your loved ones hearts…Even when they have their hands are reaching for your wallet.

[Diversity & Inclusion - Mental Health] Why Black Women Are Really Abandoning Corporate America

A psychological and emotional toll that’s too high to pay

By Stacey Tisdale

How would you feel if you got sent home from work because of the way you styled your hair? (This happens to Black women at nearly twice the rate of other groups according to Dove) How would you feel if you were repeatedly interrupted, shut down, and asked questions that made you feel like a species from another planet? How would you feel if you were constantly pitted against your sisters for that ‘one spot’ at the top? 

Even worse, how would you feel if you’re brain figured out that the only way to survive was to actually deny who you are and assimilate in order to fit into your surroundings, all on the backdrop of being one of the most underpaid, financially burdened, and socially abused groups in the country?

Enough

(Source: Working Mother Media)

More and more Black women are saying, “I can’t feel like that anymore,” and exiting corporate America in droves.

While most of us are familiar with factors like the pay gap, the ‘Black Ceiling,’ and the often-discussed systemic barriers Black women face, few realize that for many, leaving the workplace has become a question of their mental and emotional survival.

“It's a double bind. No matter what you do, you're damned. You stay silent. That's a problem. You speak out. says Tracy Laszloffy, Ph.D, from The Center For Relationship Healing.

“There's no way to be that is acceptable and that you will be validated and rewarded for. That is the nature of oppression. There is no option you can choose that is considered acceptable. That is the dilemma,” she adds.

A dilemma Dr. Laszloffy says is forcing Black women to choose between unbearable psychological and emotional stress or leaving corporate cultures to create their own work environment.

“The reality is that it requires one to adapt to the values and norms of that system just to survive,” she adds.

The Mind-Body Connection

It’s not just emotional and mental survival. Dr. Gina Torino, Associate Professor of Psychology, SUNY Empire State, points out that physical well-being is also under assault.

“What we’ve found is that the physiological impacts are really great with respect to the heart disease, high blood pressure, and insomnia experienced by African-American people in organizations,” says Torino.

Research has also found that constant exposure to factors such as microaggressions and code-switching – changing an aspect of one’s behavior in order to fit in – contribute to chromosomal changes and pre-mature death in Black women.

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Wake-Up Call

Corporate America has never been ‘better intentioned when it comes to creating inclusive corporate cultures. The George Floyd murder has ushered in a shift in consciousness that has also created a forum for conversations like the mental health of Black women.

“It's a huge problem for corporate America if you just look at the Census data and who is in the workforce…Women of color, Black and brown men make up a huge part of that,” says Jackie Glenn, Founder/CEO, Glenn Diversity, Glenn Diversity, and HR Solutions.

“So for them to be exiting organizations at such a huge rate is going to affect productivity, it’s going to affect innovation. This is real…something that we really have to have courageous conversations about,” Glenn adds.

Black Women and The Bottom Line

The Census Bureau predicts that in the United States, Whites will be the minority by 2044, and currently 48% of the members of  Generation Z – post Millennials between the ages of 6 and 21 – are from communities of color.

It’s perplexing that so many corporations around the globe continue to look at diversity and inclusion as a problem or an aspiration when it is simply nature.

Companies that truly understand this, and embrace the reality of the demographic make-up of the emerging U.S. consumer, are not only reaping revenue rewards, but they are also creating inclusive corporate cultures that are more likely to retain Black women.